• bitsplease@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Ever since my wife and I both started working from home (she joined me about 4 months ago), everytime at a family gathering people are like “wow, how’s that going”, with a smirk like they can’t imagine a worse fate

    Its going great, why wouldn’t it? My wife and I spend more time together, we get to eat lunch together everyday, chat throughout the day, dick off together when we don’t have much on our plates, it’s awesome. Why do so many people stay married to people they don’t actually want to be around?

    • douglasg14b@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Sunken cost probably.

      I’m married, I love my wife, but turns out we share few interests. Am I going to break it off because we have some issues in hopes I can find someone better? Of course not, that would be asinine.

      Some people are lucky and end up with someone who is a perfect fit, others end up with someone who is a good enough fit, others barely fit at all.

      • bitsplease@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        If I can give some unsolicited advice, if you find you don’t have many shared interests, work together to find some more! Or spend more time on the ones you do have

        Interests change and evolve over time, and people discover new interests and passions all the time!

    • Saneless@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      I worked from home for 2 years by myself and then my girl got a job where she’s mostly working from home too

      I was actually worried because I was so used to being alone but nope. It’s just fine at worst and cool to talk during the day usually

      We don’t get to talk too much or hang out too much but it never feels bad and I’m enjoying it

    • SoonaPaana@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      I’m genuinely so happy for you. It is awesome that you found someone who matches your vibe. Stay awesome bro :)

  • macrocarpa@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    I mean…isnt it self evident?

    Marriages are relationships.

    There are good and bad relationships, and relationships that are sometimes good and sometimes bad.

    People usually complain when it’s bad and don’t usually mention when it’s good.

    In the long term, some of the things that make the relationship good stop, and some of the things that make the relationship bad get worse. Marriage doesn’t allow for an easy exit hence more people stay married, unhappy.

    Give it 15 years, then check in on the op

    • The Picard Maneuver@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      True, but I’d venture it’s even simpler than that - it’s easier socially to be critical of stuff than to be positive.

      People complain about everything: their spouse, their children, their house, the small scratch on their fancy car, how many shows are on their streaming backlog, how complicated the travel was on their vacation, etc. These are all things that probably bring them lots of joy, but it’s so much easier to complain, so to someone (like OP in the image) hearing it, it sounds like the negatives outweigh the positives.

      • Durotar@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        Yeah. Even if in 15 years they won’t be happy with their spouse, let them enjoy their life today lol.

    • Zana@startrek.website
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      1 year ago

      My sister’s boyfriend got caught with a Tinder account and she was going to break up with him, but then she realized she was pregnant. They’re now married with two kids. They seem happy, I guess we will see in a few more years.

    • MarigoldPuppyFlavors@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      True but nobody tries to claim that living in sin is a bad time. So many of my coworkers try to “bond” over complaining about their wives and I’m just sitting there smiling/nodding like a schmuck who loves his wife.

      • FlexibleToast@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Have you not met society? Literally everyone asks when I’m going to propose or when we’ll get married. Even the term they used to describe it “living in sin”, implies it is sinful and bad.

  • NiCapp@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    My wife is currently sitting naked in the recliner playing video games and wiping the pizza sauce off her boob. Marriage rules.

  • ReallyKinda@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    Anecdotally my poly and perennially-on-tinder-date friends complain about their love lives at a much higher rate than my friends in more typical relationships. Poly community has a rough time dealing with jealousy and the tinder folks are often lonely.

    The few friends I have who have never really been interested in dating have the least complaints though.

    • cybermass@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      Yeah I’ve noticed the exact same thing.

      I think our society has become so used to sexualization on all fronts that a lot of people think that it’s what is expected of them, or that it’s what people want so it’s what they should want ect ect.

      There aren’t nearly as many songs or tv shows about happy boring marriages, it’s all about getting laid and partying or following a bunch of love interests but not committing to any of them or just being a “love wolf” and I don’t think that’s intentional from artists, it’s just those things are more exciting to hear about/see than something that is relatively uneventful and normal.

      In reality a lot of people I know are happier in a healthy relationship, a poly friend of mine settled down once she met a dude who treated her well and wanted the same thing. I saw her recently when she was back in town and I could tell so quickly she was so much happier.

      Myself being an attractive guy who’s also very nerdy and weird found that it was really easy to sleep with girls but hard to get into a relationship. Sleeping around just made me feel worse cause I felt like my personality was the issue, now that I’ve found someone I really connect with I’m way happier than I was dating.

  • Tygr@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    20 years later and my wife and I are still able to spend 12 hours a day together without issue because we are so compatible.

    When we worked together we had the same thing. “Oh man, how’s that going.” Is exactly right.

    Turns out, it’s projection. You’ll see later on. In fact, some of these people don’t like talking to us because we remind them of “what could have been.”

  • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 year ago

    We are constantly coming across bad advice and complaints, and I havr found it deeply confusing to try and filter out. I’m always listening to people who aren’t experts and have no clue what’s best for me - but have offered their opinion and a bit of a persuasive argument, too.

  • whataboutshutup
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    1 year ago

    GARY: wife bad

    cue in some boomer comic explaining why Gary hates his SO with sexist, racist, erotic, zoophilic, necroplic or even pedophilic undertones

    GARY: haha, wife bad