• OpenStars
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    6 months ago

    Yes but, if you will pardon the doom speech: climate change is going to kill us all? So like, don’t worry about what you cannot control. Yes keep it in mind. Yes do what you can. But if you can’t do anything, then why lose sleep over it? Every single black person that has ever lived in America has experienced this, and the vast, VAST majority of women in the past. Also most immigrants - legal or otherwise - too.

    I am making it sound like I am telling you what to do, but to rephrase, I am just hoping to offer this different perspective?

    Fwiw, I think you have a good idea to beware of it, b/c an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, as they say. Some super well-known people in the past, for reasons of their religion, have decided to not ever be alone with a woman (except their wife or daughters). This sounds like some Muslim bullshit… but actually in their case it has more than a tiny bit of merit. They have even declined the services of taxi / uber drivers if they are women - like WTF? On the other hand, how many evangelical church pastors can you think of that have been accused of, even outright proven (or like admitted it later) to have had sexual relations with someone that they should not have? I don’t even mean outside of their marriages, but in a conflict-of-interest scenario (like a therapist and their client) where the person is in their congregation. Isn’t it close to 100%? Okay probably not, but it does seem that way sometimes. Some teachers will likewise refuse to allow their office doors to be closed if a young woman student is in there with them. So go for it - stay safe, indeed. Just I hope you find your inner peace also as you do so:-). And maybe some of these practices can help with that, by providing both protection from accusations and thereby that peace of mind that the protection exists?

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        6 months ago

        Not at all - I’ve never faced that particular scenario, being more focused on college at that time in my life and also you have shown me that some things have really changed - but I do hope that mulling over this different perspective will help as you move forward:-).