• Flying Squid@lemmy.worldOP
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    2 months ago

    But is it really help if it is necessarily transactional? I wouldn’t say my mechanic helped by fixing my car because I paid him. If my neighbor fixed my car, I’d say he helped me.

    • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      I think the concept of “hired help” is a thing, at least. They’re not helping you out of the goodness of their heart, but they are helping you because they’re being paid to. If my mechanic is able to solve a car issue that I struggled with for a while on my own, I’d still call that a help even when the relationship is entirely transactional.

      I think what you’re describing with the neighbor is more like doing a favor, if I were to put words to it.

      • EABOD25@lemm.ee
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        2 months ago

        Plus it’s a psychological trick “Hey, if you help me out with this, I can help you with this”. That tells the person you want their help, and you are willing to help them. That’s a transaction as well, and improves relationships

        • Stovetop@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          100%. Humans are social animals primarily because we’ve been conditioned into behavior where helping someone means you are more likely to be helped in turn later on.

          If other members of a social unit are dependent on you, that is a transactional relationship, but providing a service for the social unit helps improve everyone’s overall quality of life, even if that service is transactional.