I know that’s probably not what was meant, but I’m reading “seals” as the animals, and the image is glorious.
Surprised Hawaii doesn’t just say “Ask Japan how it went”
Minnesota is also missing the “wears shorts in winter” tag.
Happens all the time in negative degree weather.
That tag could probably be on the entirety of the North. From Michigan
The Pacific Northwest would be horrible to invade. Even if the people don’t offer much resistance trying to get through the Rocky Mountains would be disastrous. But they actually have militias out there too.
Ah yes, those dangerous gangs of San Louis Obispo in California are really getting out of hand!
I think they’re trying to reference LA and don’t realize how far south it actually is.
Here’s a cleaned up copy
One small fix
I’m far more afraid of the Nazis in Baton Rouge running this state than I am of Acadians hunting out in the swamps. Just don’t go in the swamp! The Nazis are actively making life worse whether you seek them or not.
As an Acadian I totally agree.
You forgot about the Illinois Nazis.
I hate Illinois nazis.
As a resident of “this part wouldn’t be that tough”, i disagree. The entire Cascade range extending from the top of the central valley to the top of Washington, extending out to the ocean, is very very rough, steep, heavily forested terrain that would be absolute hell to get any kind of equipment through if the locals were to blow up a grand total of three bridges on three separate highways.
Also I always like to point out that Oregon has more guns per person than Texas, most people assume Oregon = Portland.
That stat is mainly because of Paul Harrell (RIP) and his brother.
Also, fat chance invading the USA from the Pacific. That’s like trying to get through a chastity belt by putting your dick in the padlock.
Replied to the wrong comment. Leaving it because.
Americans are the premier naval power.
Hawaii, Midway and other Pacific islands having monitoring stations.
The Pacific isn’t as easy to cross as you think due to it’s size and it has some nasty ass storms.
Pair that with the coastal regions usually having cliffs rather than somewhere a landing craft could pull up and it isn’t easy for a start.
Now mix in people who know the terrain and don’t want you there.
Why exactly?
The Pacific is pretty big, it’s an ocean after all.
The USA is particularly strong from that side. Most of its navy patrols those waters, many islands on the Pacific are USA territories all the way to Japan which itself acts as an arm of the USA Military since the forced demilitarization of Japan in WWII. Japan and other islands basically form a wall around the eastern mainland that would be difficult to cross undetected, and when they did reach the shore they might get flanked from Hawaii, Panama, or Alaska.
There is a reason Stalin chose to ally with and provide nuclear weapons to Cuba, and approach the USA via the gulf of mexico and Atlantic.
That’s good to know, thank you
The Americans are the premier naval power.
Hawaii, Midway and other Pacific islands having monitoring stations.
The Pacific isn’t as easy to cross as you think due to it’s size and it has some nasty ass storms.
Pair that with the coastal regions usually having cliffs rather than somewhere a landing craft could pull up and it isn’t easy for a start.
Now mix in people who know the terrain and don’t want you there.
you do conquer it but the locals keep trying to feed you organic, wild harvested, artisanal Amanita soup
So you’re telling me I get part of a country and the locals get me tripping balls?
Fuck yeah sign me up!
Also: the emerald triangle and that whole area of NorCal are the far-right wackos who regularly fly the state of Jackson flags, they’re heavily armed and waiting to shoot people up there
And not only do we also wear shorts in the winter, we refuse to use umbrellas no matter how hard it’s pouring outside.
Also, Sasquatch.
“Terrain is the first enemy your army will encounter” - Sun Tzu (not really, I just made that up)
The first enemy your army will encounter is usually logistics.
Nah man, it’s the yo mama jokes you’re sending via Morse code nonstop
Depending on how far back you want to go, you could make the argument for your army’s first enemy being…
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Basic training
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Recruitment
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Their mothers’ birth canals
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The dating scene in their home villages
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Terrain is definitely an enemy you will encounter.
Texas should just say “Guns”.
North Dakota should probably be “no civilization, no resources, and no warmth.”
ND has oil and nukes.
Does it really have oil?
And I know it’s got a fuckton of missile silos but I imagine in an invasion they aren’t terribly useful. I guess maybe an after you take complete control then it is
Hey now, we have some resources. Like… uh… hotdish?
Why are you walking away, weren’t you invading?
Y’all grow a mean sugarbeet
Don’t you guys have a fire cavern? That has to produce some warmth.
No, that would require a cave, which implies the existence of interesting geological features.
Which are reserved for South Dakota and Montana.
North Dakota explicitly gets nothing. I’m pretty sure it’s in the constitution.
I want to see what exactly what our Long Range Mormons (LRMs) are capable of
They’ve got a long pedigree…
CMP people? What’s that
Civilian Marksmanship Program.
Garands, Garands everywhere.
The CPU instruction to compare, I think. (I lived around there for a number of years and have no idea)
Corps of military police? No idea either
all the retired people in Florida too
