• Snapz@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    Luigi, I can forgive a lot, but shareholder value… How could you, man?

    How am I supposed to tell my kids about his when they are back from the character building camp I sent them to where they were hunting lesser human beings for sport in an eastern European country I won’t name? This is really going to crush their big, delicate hearts…

    • Tangent5280@lemmy.world
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      3 days ago

      Pff, peasant, sending your children off to some far ofd shithole. Shell out some real money and I’m pretty sure you can find some human hunting grounds within the U S of A. Turn it into family bonding time like a good father.

      • Snapz@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Hey!!! DON’T YOU DARE call it a far off shithole!!! That is the place were I get the underaged nannies that I get pregnant from! These are the undocumented mothers of some of the children I don’t care about as much as my “on the books” kids, but they have my DNA - so have some fucking respect!

        Actually, I sense a little jealously as you’ve probably realized that I can/will be able to farm all of these tier 2 children’s organs eventually to extend the life of my pure A-tier family. Green does not look good on you, buddy!