This is sadly not news, the feud between the LGBT and Chic-Fil-A is pretty long
It goes like this
-2011-
Chic-Fil-A: Our money goes to Christian charities
LGBT: Well that’s fine, you are the Jesus Chicken place, pass me some waffle fries my man
Chic-Fil-A: Sure, that’ll be a dollar, a dollar that prevents gays from getting married
LGBT: Wait, I thought you said charities
Chic-Fil-A: We lied
-2015-
Chic-Fil-A: Okay Gay Marriage is legal and Caitlyn Jenner + Lavrene Cox seem to be getting the ball rolling on trans rights. I guess we have no choice but to abandon “Traditional Marriage” and other such causes and just stick to charity work…
Caitlyn Jenner: I’m the worst human being alive, I hate all other transpeople, the only moral transition is my transition, and I am literally guilty of vehicular homicide but am too rich to be charged with it!
Chic-Fil-A: Okay just Lavrene Cox then… So you hungry my rainbow friend?
LGBT: Oh thank God, I can finally have a decent chicken sandwich, God what is your secret?
Chic-Fil-A: Why the lies we tell about what we fund go into every mouth-watering bite of our Homophobic Chicken!
LGBT: What?
Chic-Fil-A: Shit, did I say that out loud? Fuck, okay you got us, we’re still funding Anti-LGBT causes we’re just trying to be quieter about it, also we don’t think abortion should be legal and are lobbying to have that banned to.
LGBT: WHAT!?! I’M PROTESTING YOU SO HARD!
Left-Leaning Americans: And we’ll help!
Fox News: Chic-Fil-A, which is not homophobic at all, is being protested because Democrats are mad that a store is closed on Sundays because they hate the bible! No really, this is a spin we actually went with to demonize our political enemies!
Right-Leaning Americans: I believe that whole-heartedly because I have no ability to question any information that sounds like it’s even remotely true unless it comes from a Democrat. I always knew that gays hated Jesus and will now give all my money to Chic-Fil-A.
-2025-
Chic-Fil-A: So uhh now that we’re all being mask off, can I interest in you a lemonade, you must be very thirsty after playing in girl’s sports you filthy degenerate.
LGBT: Oh fuck off, you know damn well we don’t and that you don’t care about women’s sports anyway, how are you still in business?
Chic-Fil-A: Actually we’re making record profits because of those guys
LGBT: What guys?
Left-Leaning Americans: We know it’s homophobic, but we’re addicted to fast food and it tastes just so fucking good. Your suffering is no reason for me to be slightly inconveinced, even though everyone from McDonalds to KFC has a chicken sandwich just like theirs…
Right-Leaning Americans: MAGA! MAGA! MAGA! GOTTA PWN THE LIBS! WHITE LIVES MATTER! I’M ORDERING EXTRA SANDWICHES JUST TO SPITE THE DISGUSTING FREAKS… cut off by the munching of fries WHO… slurping coke ARE COMING FOR OUR KIDS!
This is sadly not news, the feud between the LGBT and Chic-Fil-A is pretty long
It goes like this
-2011-
Chic-Fil-A: Our money goes to Christian charities
LGBT: Well that’s fine, you are the Jesus Chicken place, pass me some waffle fries my man
Chic-Fil-A: Sure, that’ll be a dollar, a dollar that prevents gays from getting married
LGBT: Wait, I thought you said charities
Chic-Fil-A: We lied
-2015-
Chic-Fil-A: Okay Gay Marriage is legal and Caitlyn Jenner + Lavrene Cox seem to be getting the ball rolling on trans rights. I guess we have no choice but to abandon “Traditional Marriage” and other such causes and just stick to charity work…
Caitlyn Jenner: I’m the worst human being alive, I hate all other transpeople, the only moral transition is my transition, and I am literally guilty of vehicular homicide but am too rich to be charged with it!
Chic-Fil-A: Okay just Lavrene Cox then… So you hungry my rainbow friend?
LGBT: Oh thank God, I can finally have a decent chicken sandwich, God what is your secret?
Chic-Fil-A: Why the lies we tell about what we fund go into every mouth-watering bite of our Homophobic Chicken!
LGBT: What?
Chic-Fil-A: Shit, did I say that out loud? Fuck, okay you got us, we’re still funding Anti-LGBT causes we’re just trying to be quieter about it, also we don’t think abortion should be legal and are lobbying to have that banned to.
LGBT: WHAT!?! I’M PROTESTING YOU SO HARD!
Left-Leaning Americans: And we’ll help!
Fox News: Chic-Fil-A, which is not homophobic at all, is being protested because Democrats are mad that a store is closed on Sundays because they hate the bible! No really, this is a spin we actually went with to demonize our political enemies!
Right-Leaning Americans: I believe that whole-heartedly because I have no ability to question any information that sounds like it’s even remotely true unless it comes from a Democrat. I always knew that gays hated Jesus and will now give all my money to Chic-Fil-A.
-2025-
Chic-Fil-A: So uhh now that we’re all being mask off, can I interest in you a lemonade, you must be very thirsty after playing in girl’s sports you filthy degenerate.
LGBT: Oh fuck off, you know damn well we don’t and that you don’t care about women’s sports anyway, how are you still in business?
Chic-Fil-A: Actually we’re making record profits because of those guys
LGBT: What guys?
Left-Leaning Americans: We know it’s homophobic, but we’re addicted to fast food and it tastes just so fucking good. Your suffering is no reason for me to be slightly inconveinced, even though everyone from McDonalds to KFC has a chicken sandwich just like theirs…
Right-Leaning Americans: MAGA! MAGA! MAGA! GOTTA PWN THE LIBS! WHITE LIVES MATTER! I’M ORDERING EXTRA SANDWICHES JUST TO SPITE THE DISGUSTING FREAKS… cut off by the munching of fries WHO… slurping coke ARE COMING FOR OUR KIDS!
LGBT: Okay yeah that sadly tracks…
And that’s basically the whole story
How can a chicken be homophobic that didn’t even make sense, chickens don’t have feelings