Hello, I(31M) guess I will begin from the start of this relationship. I became friends with Kay(24F) who is a is an ENM relationship with Jon(24M). Kay and I really hit it off and began being intimate. Fast forward to a couple weeks ago. While Kay and I were chilling Jon came home and was so upset he could barely contain himself. Kay’s demeanor changed as well. I just ignored it. The next time I was going to chill with Kay, she couldn’t because Jon needed to “apparently process something”. A week later I met up with Kay and she said she was overwhelmed and couldn’t hang out as often. I just took it at face value. I haven’t seen her since. She continues to text me, and insists she wants to see me. I am definitely confused, but should I be worried?
Worried about what? It seems clear she and J are having some issues and it's probably better to not get involved. Behind closed doors they clearly have a problem they're working through. What you need now are boundaries for yourself and to think about and talk about your own personal expectations with K.
I'm not sure exactly. Worried about Kay's happiness and maybe safety. It just has left a bad gut feeling that I cannot shake.
Communication is key. Text her like, "Hey was thinking about you, everything ok with you and Jon?" And let her fill in the open-ended question with whatever she's comfortable telling you about.
I was going to send a very specific and throughout message. I have it typed out and almost ready to send. But your suggestion may be better. We have been texting eachother Good morning and good night texts for months now. maybe I should drop it in one of them.