Hehe, the world definitely needs more of this!

      • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz
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        6 days ago

        Hey Jeanist. You’re pretty chill and you raise good points. I also really fucking hate the tendency for people to pathologize others for the smallest reasons or conflicts. I’m sorry that’s the behavior I’ve invoked with my comment.

        I definitely don’t intend to justify that because I hate that too, especially the way we even conceptualize NPD within the DSM.

        I would just like to say here that I don’t have a better term to describe the “cultural narcissism” that we’re raised in here in America. That’s literally what it is, not NPD just traits what we typically associate with it but as cultural values. I would like to use a better term to describe it but the closest things I’ve heard could be “Magical determinism” but that’s something different. Or “Toxic individualism” but I just made that one up and it doesn’t seem quite salient. Do you live in America and would you recommend any better term to describe this specific thing? If you want to PM about it too I’m down to talk about this at length without spectators.

          • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz
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            6 days ago

            I’ve interacted with Jeanist before and they are cool. I can tell I upset them and their heart is in the right place. Since coming to Lemmy I’ve noticed that most people here are really more nice and definitely more intelligent then we have been trained to assume. We all just gotta unpack some baggage we have learned from other social medias. I know using reddit for years made me an utter fucking tool.

            I looked through your spat with them and you seem smart too. I think you both could have this conversation in a more productive way if you had just started off on the right foot. I appreciate you speaking up for me though. You’re right that I didn’t mean it to throw literal NPD people under the bus.

            • HikingVet@lemmy.ca
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              6 days ago

              Yeah, no. They called me a gatekeeper, said I wasn’t Aroace, and called me a pedophile.

              They also expected you to call them a narcissist and a bunch of other things.

              They also doubled down on using definitions they showed a lack of understanding of.

              I got screen caps of them behaving in a manner they were trying to accuse you of.

              • sad_detective_man@sopuli.xyz
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                6 days ago

                Oh, I saw it all. That was definitely ugly. Baseless pedo accusations are not okay. I can usually tell the difference between when somebody is lashing out and if they’re like a serial bad actor with a history of that shit. In my dealings with them, they really didn’t strike me that way.

                I also had a bunch of people just straight up diagnose me with a bunch of heinous shit one time in my life where I tried to having some basic bare minimum authenticity. So I get why they freaked out, even if I don’t like all the stuff they said to you. I was hoping I could bring them back to a gentler interaction by not rising to the callout. I just really like the fediverse and believe in our potential to break our old habits here

      • HikingVet@lemmy.ca
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        6 days ago

        What the actual fuck dude? Why you tying aroace to narcissism?

        edit: upon further interaction with this asshole I have determined they are acting in bad faith and do not understand the words they are using.

                  • HikingVet@lemmy.ca
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                    6 days ago

                    I am aroace

                    Says a random internet commentor. Narcissius is the fucking model for the condition named after him. Claiming his behaviour is AroAce is hate and paints us all as vain and self absorbed.

                    Your assertions are not based in knowledge but your own feelings.

                    The first comment I replied to of yours is filled with examples of why you should have said less.

                    Go fuck yourself. It’s what you want to do anyway.

                    Besides, Hestia is older.