Transcription (of iMessage exchange): “Hi, is this Paul?
Who is this
This is Erica from the dentist’s office. I got your number from your file
Pretty sure this violates Hippo but shoot your shot I guess
I’m not flirting with you. We have you on video stealing thousands of dollars of x-ray equipment”
I am just imagining him bored waiting for them to come back and he is like “fuck this, I am taking this shit, make this wait worth my while” and then just pulls out a tool belt and starts unbolting the thing from the wall.