• Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    Men are also different from women. Not just physically but mentally. Part of the problem the writer had was not understanding how male friendships work and expecting a mirror of female friendships. Certainly it can be lonelier as a man but in some ways it’s just the way we are.

    You ain’t never had a friend.

    • spaduf@slrpnk.netOPM
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      1 year ago

      I think the important thing here is that there’s absolutely no reason it HAS to be this way. These aren’t intrinsic properties of male and female friendships. They are driven primarily by cultural factors and have changed significantly even over recent history.

        • migo@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Where do you? Do you think that all societies in the world have the same culture as you?

          • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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            1 year ago

            I’m just saying the cultures arise from the people. There’s a reason things are the way they are and it’s not some evil corporation or government trying to oppress us. At least in the west. Can’t quite say that about China or other Communist regimes.

            • ThatWeirdGuy1001@sh.itjust.works
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              1 year ago

              Things are the way they are because people are forced into the culture they were born into and are pressured at every angle to stay that way or face social backlash.

              I got called gay cause I got too excited while talking to one of my friends. Because it’s a common culture trait in America that any overly positive emotion towards another guy means your a sissy boy

              • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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                1 year ago

                They called you gay not because they thought you were homosexual but as an offhanded insult. The two definitions have been disconnected for quite a while.

    • fckreddit@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Bro, I would do anything for long, deep hugs. I am unlucky enough to never have been hugged by anyone.

        • Default_Defect@midwest.social
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          1 year ago

          Easily possible. Grow up somewhere with a lot of macho man mentality with a toxic masculine father figure that wants nothing more than for you to grow up to be their clone that only like MAN stuff. Took me over 30 years to be hugged the way I didn’t know i needed to be hugged because I fell into a friendship with a woman that knew a few broken men.

    • PeepinGoodArgs@reddthat.com
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      1 year ago

      in some ways it’s just the way we are.

      Is it? What makes you think that our loneliness is inherent to us? How is it inherent to us?

      • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I’m just saying that men in general have a much easier time being alone. I don’t think we should always be alone, but more men than women have the ability to be solitary and happy at the same time.

        • girlfreddy@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          What if being solitary and happy has zero foundation in being a “man” but comes about from being rejected by society as the man one is?

    • bouh@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      The problem is not about you. It’s about your ability to accept another man who wants a “female” friendship. And apparently you don’t want any of that, which makes you part of the problem.

      • Tb0n3@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        I’m talking about a woman who wanted to physically be a man but is still mentally programmed as a woman could not understand male friendships. It’s not that men don’t have friends or deep friendships. It’s just that they’re usually different from the opposite gender.