• Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      Only if your sub is cool with it, but they need to know going in that either option is likely to chafe and dig into the sensitive skin around their wrists, possibly even causing bleeding depending on how much they strain against them. Definitely not recommended for a first time if you don’t know what your own responses to stimuli are likely to be.

      Much better to use a soft hemp rope, around a quarter inch thick or more, and make sure you’re binding with safe knots. You can’t just go in with any old naval knot or whatever; there are specific bindings that are safe for use on people; look them up. Always check your bindings to ensure a safe amount of slack (you should be able to easily slide a finger around any part of the wrist or ankle for proper circulation) and always make sure you have a set of EMT clothing shears handy in case something goes wrong. No, kitchen scissors are not good enough; EMT shears have serration, and specially shaped blades, in order to cut through heavy fabric or bindings easily.

      Also please don’t use duct tape, there’s literally no way to have it bind but also have sufficient slack. You will impede circulation. Just a terrible idea.

      • There are padded, even fuzzy, handcuffs. Zip ties are never going to be comfortable. The sign doesn’t say anything about consent, though. It merely specifies “must.”

        It’s not my bag, baby, so I know very little about that subculture… but FWIW “only if your sub is cool with it” should be a universally understood given, right? In the “goes without saying” way.

        • Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works
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          4 months ago

          It should go without saying, but unfortunately there’s a lot in the kink space that should go without saying, but still has to be said, over and and over, because a lot of people come into the scene via entry points like 50 Shades that are almost antithetical to the idea of safe consensual kink.

          Also, fair warning, the “padding” on most padded cuffs won’t do shit to stop them from digging in. Fabric compresses against metal, with the result that you still have an unyielding and relatively small point of contact. A good safe bondage knot will spread the point of restraint across several inches of skin, so the pressure at any one point is minimal.

          Shibari You Can Use has some excellent guides to safe restraint, if you want to learn more.

          • 𝕽𝖚𝖆𝖎𝖉𝖍𝖗𝖎𝖌𝖍@midwest.social
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            4 months ago

            Shibari You Can Use has some excellent guides to safe restraint, if you want to learn more.

            Ha, thanks. But no. I’m neither a sadist, nor a masochist; hurting or being hurt is the biggest turn-off for me.

            To each their own.

              • Voroxpete@sh.itjust.works
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                4 months ago

                Yep. And this, right here, is a perfect example of “things that should go without saying still need to be said.”

                People should know that bondage and sado-masochism are not the same thing, and yet so many don’t.