I knit and crochet. I’ve dabbled in making little personal websites off and on through the years and I’m looking to get into web development now. I haven’t done open source work yet, but I’d like to give it a try!

Ich möchte Deutsch lernen, deshalb lauere ich manchmal im Deutschen Zeitschriften/Gemeinschaften.

Here’s where I got my lime avatar image.

  • 0 Posts
  • 19 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
cake
Cake day: June 12th, 2023

help-circle
  • I haven’t had this problem. Are people pasting links to someone else’s post into their post or is this from boosts? Is it quotes? I don’t think Mastodon has quote posts, but Firefish and potentially other Misskey variants do. Do you have an example? I primarily use Firefish instead of Mastodon so I am admittedly not the most experienced Mastodon user, but even when I scroll through my Mastodon account, posts and boosts open in my own server when I click them and I can star or bookmark or boost them myself from that page.

    I am curious about what’s happening exactly so I can understand it better, I hope my questions don’t come off as hostile.




  • Kbin does a better job of putting new posts in front of you even before you have subscribed to anything, so I think it is easier to find interesting things to read. Kbin is newer than Lemmy, so Lemmy had the advantage in familiarity for people. More people had heard of it when Reddit’s API drama blew up and that gave Lemmy a distinct advantage when people picked a new platform. Kbin also has some annoyances like not being able to collapse comments and vote buttons being at the top instead of the bottom of posts and comments. If someone has written a lengthy comment, I want to read through the whole thing before I decide how to vote and I don’t want to scroll back up to get to a vote button. To reply to a post you also have to scroll through the comment section. In some cases it’s good to see if someone else has already said what you are going to say, but in other cases if someone is looking for personal stories, you don’t necessarily need to read everyone else’s story before submitting your own.

    Personally I have this kbin account and a lemmy account as well. My Lemmy server seems to go down more often and the default sort always shows the same days old pinned posts from my server admin that I can’t seem to hide after reading. On Reddit, I didn’t have to switch sort to see newer stuff so Lemmy comes across as pretty stale sometimes even though there is a fair amount of posting going on.


  • Even if you ditch the monetization and manage to find a way to keep out third party bots (who will still want to show up and part lonely men from their money), I promise there are a lot of scummy legitimate users of dating sites. Men have to wade through a thousand bots, women have to wade through a thousand jerks who ignore all their preferences and boundaries.

    As a woman, my biggest problem isn’t the terrible monetization schemes of the dating sites and it’s not the bots because the bots don’t waste their time on me. It’s the users themselves. Many people put fake ages, so you’ll try to date someone your own age and get propositioned by lots of people who are of an entirely different generation than you. All interactions are private which means there’s no community policing. Yeah, I don’t like talking intimately in front of a public audience either, but if a guy is too clingy and persistent with a woman in a room full of people, her body language will show her distress and other people sometimes step in and tell him to back off and give her a break and he might even get kicked out if he is annoying enough. On dating sites the guys with no regards for boundaries can send a thousand vulgar unsolicited messages with no repercussions. The good, respectful men and their messages get drowned out by the flood of disrespect. The fediverse can’t fix that problem.

    I am a shy introvert and large gatherings aren’t really my thing, but online dating is a total bust for me. I found my first boyfriend through AOL in the 90s and have given online dating many tries because I am so dang shy in person and find it easier to write my thoughts than speak them, but the cost/benefit ratio just hasn’t panned out.




  • It was really disappointing and cringy. I thought the show came out after the Thailand cave incident where he said people who were helping rescue trapped children were only in the country because they were pedophiles, but I just looked up the dates and the first season of Discovery came out a year before that incident. I waited a while to get Paramount+ because I didn’t want yet another streaming service on top of Netflix and Hulu.

    The Musk references aged very quickly. It’s not great to name off living people as future historic figures when they are still alive and able to wreck their legacies.





  • Lemmy is the software a lot of the Reddit style fediverse websites run on. Many of them include Lemmy in the name such as Lemmy.ml and Lemmy.world, but others don’t include Lemmy in the name. Beehaw.org is another website that runs the Lemmy software, it just didn’t put Lemmy in its name. Beehaw does have an uncommon configuration since the down vote ability is disabled there, but it still is Lemmy at its core. Beehaw did defederate from some of the other big Lemmy servers because they were overwhelmed with trying to moderate that much content and those servers reportedly had open sign ups which led to a big influx of spammy bots, so Lemmy.world and beehaw.org are invisible to each other right now, but the admins of Beehaw have expressed a desire for more granular moderation tools in order not to have to defederate from such large servers as a whole in the future.

    Kbin is a different software altogether so the kbin servers such as kbin.social and fedia.io have a different layout, terminology, and some different features than the Lemmy based servers, but Lemmy and Kbin both use the ActivityPub protocol to send and fetch data, so you can post between the two platforms as if they were on the same server. I am browsing this post and writing this reply from kbin.social.


  • Beehaw markets themselves as a heavily moderated space and they caught a lot of flack for defederating from Lemmy.world and sh.itjust.works, but even they are still federated with a bunch of different instances. There will probably be a pool of instances that share a fairly hands-off approach and remain connected to all the other instances that have a “we’ll federate with anyone” policy. There will likely be a collection of middle-ground instances who defederate with instances that are the source a lot of harassment or certain NSFW material but otherwise don’t restrict much and still federate with instances that maintain similar moderation styles. At the far end you end up with places like Gab and Truth Social which are both Mastodon instances that aren’t federated at all and are completely closed communities because they only ever wanted to be an echo chamber. The rest of the fediverse or even just Mastodon didn’t cease to exist when Truth Social started up its own walled off instance.

    People can self select into the kinds of communities they like. The unrestricted ones will only fail if the lack of moderation is such a problem that nobody signs up to any of them.



  • I would definitely recommend Strange New Worlds. It has a great cast and the return to an episodic format allows for a lot of variety in conflicts and dilemmas faced by the crew. Next up I would recommend The Orville. I hate Family Guy, Seth MacFarlane’s humor is very off -putting to me so I was skeptical, but really the show was delightful and felt a lot like TNG era Star Trek to me. The show has some crass elements still, but they aren’t overbearing. Honestly, Lower Decks is a lot worse on that front than The Orville and feels way more juvenile to me. People say Lower Decks is supposed to get better in season 2 but I watched some season 2 episodes with my roommates and still found it unbearable. If you like Family Guy/Rick and Morty, you might enjoy it more than I did since most people do seem to love that one.

    The other new Trek shows are too busy facing overly big, galactic apocalypse-level threats throughout each entire season to delve into much real philosophy or analysis of the human condition and the crushing threats are so extreme that even when the shows do focus on the human side and try to look at something personal, you start to wonder why people are stopping to have a long discussion about their emotions and relationship struggles in the presence of immediate danger to their lives. Even when the discussions are good, the timing is bad enough for it to not make sense. A lot of details like that are very immersion breaking for me as a viewer.

    Picard season 3 was a well balanced nostalgia trip. It was a lot more relatable than seasons 1 and 2 and has some really great human(oid) moments dealing with pride, regret, grief, belonging, and passing the torch to the next generation. It was fan service done well. It still does the new Trek thing of a big, impending threat but does a better job of keeping that threat at arm’s length enough for the interpersonal discussions to feel more impactful and logical in the moment. I was so disappointed in seasons 1 and 2 that I almost skipped 3, but now I am rooting for a spin off from season 3 with the new characters they introduced.



  • Considering the parents aren’t together, it’s not like the effect on the mother will be a divorce after decades of marriage to this man, so I don’t think that’s as big of a deal here. Is your wife certain it was even consensual? People here are quick to blame the mother for a mistake, but a one time event may be a rape, not necessarily an affair. I’ve got a nephew who was conceived through rape.

    The father will probably catch on eventually, so even if your wife waits for him to realize what’s going on, she still needs to be prepared to tell him he’s been her father for all x years of her life and a printout of DNA results doesn’t change a lifetime of lived experience with him. She can’t control whether he chooses to stay involved or withdraw once he figures it out though, if he already withdrew once he may do it again if he values blood connections over social ones. On the other hand, he could be playing dumb in his interpretation of the results because he doesn’t want to lose the father/daughter relationship either.