Hello everyone. I recently learned there are a handful of people in my community who engage in non-barriered intercourse by default (sex with multiple partners without condoms).
I try to keep to only one non-barriered partner, to minimize any STI spread that may occur. Though testing is important, there are risks that 1. A test may be wrong, and 2. An infection can be introduced and spread after a successful clean test.
Also, my partner has a history of getting BV if her non-barriered partner(s) have other non-barriered partners. So, we keep it to only one non-barriered partner (for intercourse).
Any thoughts on this? Is it ethical to have more than one? Is it sustainable to only have one?
To me it all depends on the shape my relationships take, there isn’t a one size fits all answer.
As it stands right now, I’ve have one serious partner. However, my partner has a total of 3 serious relationships. The way things are currently setup is that there is barrier free sex within committed, serious relationships (or that will be on the table at some point), but for newer relationships and/or flings: the number of condoms used needs to be equal to or greater than then number of penises involved.
While testing is important, I don’t have too much to say on this. It comes down to communication and openness. I mean, while they’re best avoided, often the stigma around the STI is worse than the STI itself (not universally true, I know).
As for the ethics of it: I don’t understand why it would be unethical, as long as everyone is communicating, truthful, and on board with things.