1. The New Madrid fault is a slow beast, but not to be taken lightly. There are large lakes in that region that exist solely because of earthquakes changing the path of the Mississippi River.
2. I once drove through Cooter, Missouri on my way to a wedding in northwest Tennessee specifically to send my wife a cheeky postcard, and those motherfuckers didn’t postmark it until they’d carted it over to the next town with a larger post office. My disappointment was immeasurable and my day was ruined.

good for her i guess

So they’re saying the cooter was vibrated.

There comes a time in every states life where certain feelings begin to happen, its perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of.

Missouri is a woman? And why they talking about her cooter like that?

Missouri? Show me!

I’ll rattle YOUR cooter!

Massive flooding to follow.