I was bought an expensive dress from a store that has couches in the changing rooms.
I’ve tasted the sweet ambrosia of wealth and I want more like a hungry vampire.
It has become clear to me that by seeing how the other half live that I can no longer tolerate my “tankie” existence and I shall henceforth be pulling myself up by my thigh highs and becoming rich.
My plan includes:
- voting (hard)
- virtue signalling to the upper political class
- Smith (I’m not sure who he is but I’ve heard he has all the answers)
- turning a blind eye to the systemic problems in our system because I benefit from it
- reading the economist
Don’t worry I won’t forget you guys while I dine at gastro pubs and judge the proles for sharing the same air I breath.
I’ll even mention you when I’m rubbing elbows with the elites in a few months 🥰
Now begins my upper class crumpet life.
NYT writer tapping their pencil rapidly against the paper and clutching their head trying to think of a tasteful way to compare caviar to Chinese womens’ eggs so they can make a quippy reference to China’s birthrate.
(They can’t think of a tasteful way, but they do it anyway)
Takes another sip of their juicero smoothie
Maybe I can find inspiration from my China mood board 💡
writes about how climate change isn’t real