• Th4tGuyII@kbin.social
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    1 year ago

    As it turns out, the majority of folks are just people trying to get by, and if you’re nice enough to them, they’ll be nice enough to you.

    The problem with most terminally online people is that their social lives ended when they left school, which is when the population of arseholes is at its highest. Everybody is trying to impress everybody else, even at the cost of others.

    But a lot of those same people tend to chill off as they mature into adults and become less self-centred. There are still absolutely arsehole adults, but nowhere near as many as the terminally online expect there to be.

        • TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Punishment probably isn’t the best way to improve things. Even under your view of things, it should be clear that punishment does more to make the punisher feel good than actually solve problems.

            • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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              1 year ago

              I sympathize with your pain but also holy fuck I hope you never get your way. I’ve seen what happens when people who think like you get power, they’re brutally abusive.

            • TotallynotJessica@lemmy.world
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              Believe it or not, most people will stop doing things if they are convinced that it isn’t in their self interest. The idea that trauma is effective at getting people to stop doing something is neither accurate or acceptable. Trauma could easily make some people lash out and cause even more damage. If there’s something we shouldn’t tolerate, it’s people who want to inflict unnecessary and unproductive harm on other people. It probably didn’t make you less of a threat.

              You need help, and not just therapy. You would benefit from real life friends and positive interactions with people who treat you as an equal. Residential treatment might be a good idea if you haven’t done it before. Treatment will only work if you work with it. It’s assistance, not having the problem solved for you. You need to do some of the lifting.

        • ColorcodedResistor@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          You have my attention. A charged response like that deserves a moment of consideration at the Very least.

          What experience or experiences brought you to this opinion?

          i speak having come from a broken home, destroyed by alcohol. unwanted by my mother and never set eyes on my dad, abused physically and emotionally by said mother as she took her failures out on me…what i mean by that, is…I’ve been in the dark places and I still frequent dark thoughts. i was robbed of justice in a world that owes me nothing…I’ve felt my share of rage and misplaced entitlement. So when i ask you, what’s up? please do not think i am being dismissive nor combative. i genuinely would like to hear about ‘it’

    • Korne127@lemmy.world
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      What do you count as terminally online? I don’t differenciate between online and offline friends and spend lots of times talking or chatting to people online (as I spend time doing stuff with people irl). But I wouldn’t say that my or this social life is bad.

      • drislands@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I would classify “terminally online” as almost exclusively interacting with people online with little to no IRL at all. A bit part of that would also be that the people you interact with are people you’ve never seen.

        • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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          I’ll also add another major sign is if you don’t know their irl names. I have close friends who I met over the pandemic who live far away, but we knew each other by name and hear each other’s voices. That’s a big thing. Your Twitter/tumblr mutuals or people you regularly interact with on Reddit/Lemmy are people that terminally online people will think of as friends rather than “no we’ve never met irl but we play d&d together or have a book club over discord”.

          The other big thing is whether or not you go to irl events. Just literally being somewhere that’s neither home nor work/school helps so much.

          • Perfide@reddthat.com
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            1 year ago

            no we’ve never met irl but we play d&d together or have a book club over discord

            To be fair, DnD is one of those things I would never ever even consider playing over discord unless I considered you a very good friend, and even then it’s begrudgingly. Discord dnd sucks balls.

          • ChicoSuave@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            Being honest doesn’t mean telegraphing every impulse to the surface and acting on it. A toddler does that and it’s considered bratty, a behavior to be corrected.

            Being IRL means having immediate feedback on our actions. No extended diatribes using cut outs of their speech. No linking to articles to convince a person. It becomes a test of the social abilities of each individual and how well they can listen and speak. It flexes different skills than reading and writing.

            Try to buy from a salesman in person vs online to see the difference. IRL is vastly different from online. IRL also has the added effect of “fuck around, find out” with no down time. If you say something distasteful then you learn about it before you’re done talking by the expressions and reactions of those around you. Acting like you have been is a quick ticket to lonersville, which is probably why you’re so angry at the idea that IRL is different from online. Get out and talk to strangers. See how they react to your need to interrupt, dissect, and “win” when they werent arguing. People want to share information, not stand atop some invisible social pyramid.

      • ParsnipWitch@feddit.de
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        I’d call people that who lost contact with reality. So if something you believe could be immediately proven wrong by just stepping outside for a while, you are terminally online.

        For example the 4chan theory of: “80 % of women date only 20 % of ultra chad men”. There are people who actually believe this.

          • Perfide@reddthat.com
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            Nah, unless Match.com was popular with 4chan chuds, that theory was overwhelmingly popular on 4chan way, WAY before dating apps were mainstream.

            • SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
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              Dating apps were mainstream long before 4chan existed, although not as dominant. The idea that all of the women go for the top tier of men gained prominence with an analysis posted on the old OKCupid of their user behavior, and the particular 80/20 split was just pulled out of somewhere, likely borrowed from the Pareto Principle. In any case, 4chan may have pathologized it, but certainly did not originate the notion.

      • Th4tGuyII@kbin.social
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        My definition is more or less the same as the one @ParsnipWitch offered…

        The terminally online are thise who have little to no contact with reality. They are the shut-ins and the NEETs of this world. Those that would fully believe in conspiracies about life which could be disproven simply by interacting with others IRL.

      • Th4tGuyII@kbin.social
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        Well fuck, you got me there… In one sentence you’ve just given everyone on 4Chan the ability to touch grass.

    • quadropiss@lemmy.world
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      Nuh uh there’s a reason why social anxiety was, is, and will continue to be a problem for many people

      • oatscoop@midwest.social
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        If this is how you act around other people … I don’t think the problem is other people.

      • ShranTheWaterPoloFan@startrek.website
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        No one is ever going to acknowledge my humanity

        What does that look like to you? People are talking to you right now. I know that no one has said “you are a person” but what specifically do you want?

        Unless you were literally raised by wolves this is some self aggrandizing incel bullshit.

        Coming up with an theory of the world that confirms that you are right and everyone else is terrible is lazy. I don’t think you’ve ever actually cared about anyone but yourself.

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            I was raised by some of the most abusive people on the planet - enough to be jailed today - and surrounded exclusively by abusive peers.

            I’m sorry. Have you considered that they are perhaps not representative of the whole of humanity?

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                Furthermore, people compulsively fight and kill anyone who isn’t exactly like them

                Citation needed. How is there any diversity at all in the world? Not everyone is exactly the same.

                The only people who don’t think any person is representative of the whole of humanity are white supremacists.

                A sample size of one or a few is never totally representative of billions. Do you think everyone in the world is exactly like Greta Thunberg? People have a huge variety of values and personalities, you can’t boil everyone down to a charcuterie of the particular people you grew up with.

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            You’re talking at me, lying to me and trying to dictate reality to me.

            Let’s say someone actually wanted to help you. Let’s say they truly believed that going outside and interacting with people in person would do you good. How should such a person express their feelings and try to help while acknowledging you, respecting your humanity, and treating you as of equal value as a human?

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            Are you happy?

            It seems like you are lashing out randomly and have a world view that everything is orchestrated to harm you.

            You all made sure no one would ever care about me, even going so far as to kill yourselves to guarantee it.

            You believe that people have killed themselves to make your life worse? I don’t want to sound mean, but you aren’t the only person.

      • Signtist@lemm.ee
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        I wasted my entire life being kind to people

        Sorry, bud - kind people don’t say that. Yes, I’ve been walked all over by assholes, and I’ve been taken advantage of more times than I can count. I’ve been bullied and abused because of my body, and I’ve been made to feel like I don’t deserve to share the same planet with some people, but I’ve also met some amazing people who accept me and love me.

        The whole point of being kind is to be vulnerable, and to help people earnestly and without judgement. Why would I give a shit that some asshole got a leg up because of my effort, or felt bigger by making me feel smaller? If I help 100 jerks and one good person, at the end of the day, I helped a good person, and that makes my whole day, regardless of anything else. That’s how you find the good people in the world, and build your social circle with people who care for you.

          • Signtist@lemm.ee
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            Clearly you’ve given up hope, and need to reject the idea of other people people being happy, and surrounded by love in order to not feel like you made a mistake in doing so. Nobody’s trying to kill me, nor are they trying to kill you - people are pretty good at that, as you pointed out; when they actually want to, they don’t try to, they just do. I’ve gotten death threats before, and lo and behold they were just threats. Had anyone gotten a gun and actually came after me with it, I’d be dead. You would be too, if they were serious about their supposed effort to kill you.

            I’m in a loving marriage, with friends and what’s left of my family after I cut out the bad parts. They all support me and want me to be happy. We hang out and help one another, and it’s been years since I even met someone who I remember treating me poorly, because once you have that support network you don’t even care about those kinds of people. You end up just seeing them for what they are instead - just normal people who never learned to interact with others; pity them. You’ve still got a good chance to find your friend group. Don’t throw that chance away by just assuming such lives don’t exist - they absolutely do.

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                Alright, you’ve got people trying to kill you that’s terrible. You’ve definitely got it worse than I ever did, and you’re justified in thinking everyone’s out to get you. So start fresh. My mom never tried to kill me, but she did try to forcibly denounce my citizenship so I’d be utterly reliant upon her, so I moved across the country and lived for a few years in a closet of a bedroom owned by some lady I found on craigslist.

                It sucked, and I had pretty much no money, but in about 2 years I managed to get back on my feet. I was even able to move back to my hometown, since I didn’t want to let my mom force me to live away from where I wanted to be. I made a new social group, and let some people from the previous group back in once I assessed whether they had my best interests in mind. I’m not saying starting fresh would be easy - it’s certainly the hardest thing I’ve ever done - but it sounds like you’ve got people actively hunting you down, so if they’re as incompetent at murder as you say they are, they should have an even harder time killing you with a thousand miles between you.

                I’m not telling you about my life to brag - I’m actively encouraging you to find those same joys yourself. That’s what it looks like when someone encourages you - they tell you about how good your life can be if you regain hope.

              • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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                1 year ago

                Like… call the police idfk. This violence and abuse is foreign to me, its not most people’s experiences and you’re in a deeply dangerous situation. You get away from those people, and actually the majority of people are great.

          • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            I dont have a social circle, I talk to random people online when I feel like I wanna be social. I was just at the hardware store, looking like queer me, and the cashier was clearly a strong middle-aged white guy. He might politically want me dead. But he was nice enough. I didnt get the fear response activation vibe that he could murder me or wanted to. My name is Franzia, and it is a female name, I’m not a guy.

          • Honytawk@lemmy.zip
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            You mean like the majority of people?

            Not having someone you can rely on is the exception, not the rule.

            It is a great tool to perpetuate healthy human offspring.

              • Bartsbigbugbag@lemmy.ml
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                No one owes you a social circle, so no one can deny it to you. Social connections are forged, not given. How can people you’ve never met lie about you? They can’t, by definition. There is absolutely no possibility that you’ve met every person even within your community, much less the world, in order to be able to make that assertion. It sounds like, you’re abusive, and blame it on your prior trauma, and when people don’t accept being abused by you, you claim that they’re liars or narcissists. Nearly everyone has had trauma in their life, many people have had trauma worse than can be imagined without experiencing it, and yet, they don’t become violently angry anti-social assholes.

                Your response to trauma is a choice, and you have made a choice that prevents ever healing and creates further trauma.

                • Acer@lemm.ee
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                  It sounds like, you’re abusive, and blame it on your prior trauma, and when people don’t accept being abused by you, you claim that they’re liars or narcissists.

                  I’ve had a friend like that. It was hard cutting her off, but in the end our whole social circle agreed that was the right thing to do after enduring so much of her abuse over the years. She was crazy manipulative and always the victim, just like this dude.

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        And what magical fucking force forces people to “chill”?

        They don’t. Because that magic doesn’t fucking exist.

        I don’t say this often, but visit a Buddhist monastery.

        …and figure out where all that anger is coming from.

        and there is an entire organization of psychologists and sociologists who reject the pro-human narrative and know exactly how evil people really are

        As a target is not set up to miss it so the nature of evil does not exist in the world.

          • barsoap@lemm.ee
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            its coming from being treated unjustly my entire life

            That’s not something in your control. What is in your control is whether you add to it, including by spreading bad vibes by being chronically miserable. Don’t be a slave to your past.

            They think failure to be cruel to me proves that they are “weak” and unworthy of life.

            If everyone, ever, looks like a narcissist to you then one of two things are true: a) You’re one yourself and are literally begging for that behaviour to be kept in check, or, b) you’re jaded beyond measure. Is there not a single person that doesn’t give you the creeps? You included, btw.

            Is English not your first language? Because that’s not written correctly. The first clause does not relate to the second.

            It isn’t, but yes it is written correctly. But the Epictetus translation I paraphrased it from is better, I agree:

            As a mark is not set up for the sake of missing the aim, so neither does the nature of evil exist in the world.

              • barsoap@lemm.ee
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                What the fuck is this bullshit? And what makes you think you don’t deserve the punishment?

                You don’t deserve the reaction you’re trying to coax out of me. You’re trying to elicit it so that you can be reinforced in your beliefs, so that you can continue to say “see, it’s true, everybody hates me, everyone is an enemy”. But no amount of flailing will make me hate you. Best I can do is tickle you into submission, sorry.

                And, yes, my intent here is to dominate and my methods are manipulative. What’s the motive, though?

      • i_r_n00b@reddthat.com
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        I mean this in the nicest possible way, but I think you need to talk to someone and try and gain a new perspective. People aren’t inherently mean, and generally aren’t thinking about much other than themselves. People do “chill” as they get older and realize a lot of things really don’t matter in the long run.

        Go find a team sport or a hobby with other like-minded people and focus on building a community of friendship and support. Your life is too short to not spend it being happy.

          • isyasad@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            I will not believe anything else - especially if a lying human being sells it.

            The way that everyone else seems to be getting along normally in their lives, maybe even having fun reading through this thread, while you’re getting angry and “shouting” reminded me of a line from The Count of Monte Cristo, where the count is trying to persuade a similarly unhappy person of the existence of a god.

            ‘No,’ said Caderousse. ‘No, I do not repent. There is no God, there is no Providence. There is only chance.’

            ‘There is both Providence and God,’ said Monte Cristo. ‘The proof is that you are lying there, desperate, denying God, and I am standing before you, rich, happy, healthy and safe, clasping my hands before the God in whom you try not to believe and in whom, even so, you do believe in the depths of your heart.’

            Which is not to say that it’s a good argument; it’s actually pretty bad.
            “Look at how fortunate I am to believe in my thing, and how unfortunate you are to believe in yours” when their beliefs are totally incidental.
            But rereading it made me think about how little it matters about whose perspective is “correct” about something like that. To put it simply, there are plenty of “good people” in the world and there’s also plenty of “bad people”. Whether or not you choose to see good or bad is (in large part) up to you. Neither way is “right” or “wrong”.

            I think you would be happier if you tried to look for good instead of bad, but as you’ve stated, that’s not a goal of yours. I don’t think that you really have any more “moral integrity” than the other side though. While I’m not asking you to abandon your point of view, I think you should realize that there is a reason why your viewpoint is not very popular; it seems that you’ve had negative experiences that have caused you to become cynical about human nature but here’s a rough analysis of the numbers: the fact that most people are not that cynical is evidence that most people don’t have it that bad. People aren’t wrong to believe in good human nature when that’s what their experiences reflect. They’re coming to conclusions in the same way you are, just the other way around.

            If your experiences have been so negative, that’s an alright thing to base your views on. But I hope that you find more positive experiences in the future that might change your mind. You probably won’t find it on Lemmy.

          • Glide@lemmy.ca
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            I sincerely wish I understood how someone can get to your point. I wish I could see this as some elaborate troll, but I can’t help but see this as something so much darker. I won’t recommend anything to you, as it’s pretty clear any effort to help is seen as an insult, at best. Just know that there are genuinely people who see reactions like this and wish they could help.

            Just, sincerely, best of luck to you.

      • Th4tGuyII@kbin.social
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        What a fucking pant load. You’re so full of shit, it stinks

        Bullshit. The majority of people want to dominate everyone not in their immediate social circle. Go look up social dominance theory - it will tell you everything you need to know about how people really behave.

        I’m basing this on my life’s experience, and of those around me. That might not match your’s but what I say is true to me.

        I’m not going to say you’re wrong. As long as inequalities exist between people, there will always be in-groups and out-groups of people. Humanity is tribal, and likely always will be.

        But most people don’t spend their waking moments trying to enforce these tribalisms. Arseholes definitely do, but that’s not the majority of people.

        And what magical fucking force forces people to “chill”?

        Biology.

        The human brain doesn’t come pre-built. There are many parts that develop at different rates, with the pre-cortex (the “rational” part of your brain) still developing even into your mid-20s.

        During your adolescence this process is nowhere near complete, thus adolescents are generally severely lacking in the long-term judgement and planning department. They are more likely to be impulsive, to jump on the bandwagon of peer pressure without thinking through the consequences.

        As they get older, most people become generally better at thinking things through. Less likely to act on impulse, and more likely to listen to others. They learn about viewpoints way outside their own and start to become less self-absorbed. At least that’s my experience of growing around my peers.

        They don’t. Because that magic doesn’t fucking exist. Only the trauma of punishment makes people stop abusing others. Without the threat of permanent injury on themselves, people will always try to permanently injure others as a means to dominate and control - at least for the sake of their social groups. That desperate need to dominate and control is what makes them human.

        You are spreading self-aggrandizing lies; spreading an infection that will only cause more people to get more “uppity” and beat more innocent people to death. Stop lying about people and apologizing for their bloodlust. People are murderers, hunters for the only “game” still left - forcibly isolated human beings.

        I wasted my entire life being kind to people, only to mock me for being so stupid, so gullible enough to fall for the con that they would be nice back. They beat me like they were mining for ore, driving blow after blow into my skull until it was permanently disfigured, and then they broke every bone in my limbs until they didn’t work anymore.

        Don’t give me this horseshit about how people “chill out” - I did not get almost murdered over fifteen years by people who would simply magically stop being murderous because some timer ran out. No, those motherfuckers murdered as if it was a fucking religious mandate and they are the same type of assholes who tried to take over the U.S. on January 6th.

        No one is ever going to acknowledge my humanity, no matter how kind I am, or what I do. I will always be seen as a “less than” because the ENTIRE human race are malignant narcissists - and there is an entire organization of psychologists and sociologists who reject the pro-human narrative and know exactly how evil people really are. Quit apologizing for rapists and murderers.

        Jesus christ you went off the deep end quick, I am not responding to all of that…

        I don’t know what kind of life you’ve experienced, but you’ve got some deep-seated traumas up in that head of yours that you need to figure out.

        Not only that, but you’ve seemingly driven yourself into an almost schizophrenic delusion that everybody is after you, looking for a chance to tear you down in whatever way they can. That’s just not the case.

        If your tendency is to explode on anyone who disagrees about your worldview, to compare them to murderers, then I’m afraid you might just be the problem in your lack of a social life - I’ll leave you with this:

        “If you run into an asshole in the morning, you ran into an asshole. If you run into assholes all day, you’re the asshole” - Raylan Givens, Justified

        • nonfuinoncuro@lemm.ee
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          you’ve seemingly driven yourself into an almost schizophrenic delusion that everybody is after you

          It’s not almost, they sound exactly like my old classmate who unfortunately did spiral down the path of paranoid schizophrenia. Nobody here is going to change their mind, despite your best intentions. Even professionals don’t have much better luck.

          • tabarnaski@sh.itjust.works
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            I might be late to the discussion, but it seems that your life has been hard and full of abuse. A lot of people here answered your comments with compassion, but your replies were almost always aggressive. It’s ok to feel hatred towards your abusers, but the fact that you seem to immediately hate people that try to peacefully communicate with you is, objectively, very wrong. Even if all the abusers in the world died tomorrow, would you be happy?

      • KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        I don’t necessarily agree with your aggressive tone but I do agree with a lot of what you’re saying, this from someone who was treated like complete shit as a young adult, shit enough to leave me with trauma and a really bad fear of people.

        I’ve seen what the worst side of people while being a soft kind and caring person. Anyone who believes what the other person said is pretty naive.

  • NateNate60@lemmy.ml
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    When real life does not match up with the description given by social rejects on a site notorious for infidelity

  • Moc@lemmy.world
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    ⛺️🔥 Rest here traveller. Reading the comments in this thread can get tiring.

  • orca@orcas.enjoying.yachts
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    Using high school as a marker for what to expect for the rest of life is such a terrible idea. Just throw that in the rubbish and go experience people for yourself. Wade through the assholes and you’ll find tons of nice folks just trying to live.

    • saruwatarikooji@lemmy.world
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      While that is true… There is still a ton of high school bullshit going on, especially in workplaces.

      All the same drama and gossip… I’m so glad I don’t work in an office anymore.

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      It’s true. I think the amount of attention highschool gets, from people saying it was the best years of their lives, to adults coming down hard on you to do the best thing for your future, to your peers seemingly having an amazing time while you’re not, winds up making teens feel like it is indicative of how life will be in general.

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        It never made sense to me, but I wasn’t having a GREAT time until I was in my mid 30s. I had something like a 7 year party. Disposable income, before the worst of my aches set in, and just doing whatever I wanted as long as I made it in to work.

        High school was Lord of the Flies.

    • Root@discuss.tchncs.de
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      It just goes to show the average age of anons. Too sad if they plateau around that.

      • “X raped my childhood!”
      • “Jeez, Michael, you’re in your 20’s.”
  • Comment105@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    When you’re terminally online, it helps to be at least reminded that online culture isn’t normal, especially not 4chan. But Reddit, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram are all full of their own weirdness.

    Better than recognizing that would be to reintegrate into society fully and leave the internet mostly behind to sulk and moan.

    • at_an_angle@lemmy.one
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      1 year ago

      I’ll say that at this point, 4chan has been the least toxic of the websites you listed. I left Facebook and still visit 4chan.

      But you are correct. People need to unplug more and get outside.

      • banneryear1868@lemmy.world
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        There’s a way this is true but hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it. I think 4chan is much more openly toxic and shocking, but I used to mod defaults on reddit and all the same toxicity exists, except its dressed up in nice language and intentions. 4chan, to its detriment or success, is more accepting in a way. Reddit is full of people who know better than you and want to shame people for being stupid, far more judgemental. Some places on reddit are far better than 4chan though and don’t have this issue,

        • at_an_angle@lemmy.one
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          Think that might be why I see it that way.

          I’d rather hang out with a bunch of self admitted degenerate assholes than those who are the same but dress it up and claim to be better.

          • banneryear1868@lemmy.world
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            4chan in the 00s was something I don’t think can ever exist again on the internet. It basically focus-grouped the sort of content that turned in to what the internet is today. I became a total loser at just the right time to experience it coming in to form, then became normal again at just the right time to leave before it became infected with politics.

            Crazy story is when I first met my friend’s wife, the last person you’d expect to be a b-slur, we basically instantly and telepathically realized we’d both been on 4chan in the 00s. I dunno what it is but the sort of humor on that site was so specific and fucked up that you instantly recognize it.

    • ToyDork@lemmy.caB
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      I would, but I can’t can’t act like a(n emotionally considerate) 10 year old like I want to in real life. Yes, I know it’s weird, but no, I still feel rage at CSAM and am asexual.

      That said, if you won’t try in real life… Well, the body can’t gave a social life without the mind. If the real world isn’t enough for some reason, learning to socialize in VR might ease the fear by providing comfort, just make sure your expensive goggles were worth it and actually say hi!

  • captainlezbian@lemmy.world
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    That’s so sad. Like I get it, I’ve been the internet shut in and it’s just brutal on your mental health. The blunt reality is that most people are fine and plenty are great. Talk to strangers, you might make friends

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    Most people like being around other people who are chill and respectful. There’s no magic trickery about it. Get outside and talk to people.

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        Results vary by region… You can try that for a while in northern Europe for example. In southern Europe the first person you speak to will probably end up inviting you for dinner with the family.

  • Franzia@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    I tried community college first online and then in person at 19/20. Felt so anxious about everything. Mom drove me there and back and was really mean about having to do it. Classes of normies were uber-social, like everybody introduce yourselves and talk aboit the topic. Felt fuck me eyes coming from everyone, which I was probanly returning, but it was a LOT of attention for my loner self. I stopped going and Mom resented me because it cost thousands for like nothing but she didnt want to do it my way either so it was sort of her fault as well. Anyway it was probanly trans dysphoria too. Of course my every waking moment I was like I wonder if they can tell Im feminine please tell me this will help me be more openly queer. Lol.

    • squiblet@kbin.social
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      Incels think of lots of complicated theories about society and appearances to explain why they think women are not attracted to them

      • pthaloblue@sh.itjust.works
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        That’s interesting, they’re pretty much the same techniques used by racists from the 17-1900s to determine racial superiority. It’s like it never went away, just crawled into 4chan

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          Racist phrenology is alive and well among the racists who hang out on 4chan, and definitely, they also apply it to incel theory, mixed with misogyny and a feeling that genetics and society dealt them an unfair and poor hand which can’t be rectified.

          • pthaloblue@sh.itjust.works
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            Imagine being trapped by your own shitty illogical standards. I want to say I pity them but I don’t, their hate has victims.

        • neintynein@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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          It’s less that there’s a thread of racial superiority that has been continuously passed on, and more than there is a human bias towards rationalizing away complex issues